You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
