He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
