Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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