if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
