I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
