I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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