Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
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