I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
