i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
