And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
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