You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
