Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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