Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
you will always have a special place in my vag
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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