I want to walk on stilts...naked
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
