Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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