I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
