last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
