So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
