I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
