? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize
