The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
