Buhtt sex?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
