so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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