I CAN MOONWALK!
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
