you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I am naked and annoyed.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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