Do you still have your period?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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