This is not my ceiling
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
