I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Randomize
