Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
