Christians are straight up FREAKS
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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