Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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