I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize