It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
