I need help removing her.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
the liver wants what the liver wants
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
