she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
