Texts From Last Night · herpaderpin's Favorites

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herpaderpin's Favorites Texts:

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(303): View more from Colorado

Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles

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(712): View more from Iowa

The police scanner is talking about you again....

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(512): View more from Texas

Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.

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(435): View more from Utah

I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

ur mom makes the best bacon

(1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE

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(949): View more from California

I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall

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(516): View more from New York

Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?

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