Texts From Last Night · crazypsyco710's Favorites

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crazypsyco710's Favorites Texts:

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(641): View more from Iowa

He smells so good today

(1-641): View more from Iowa

Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.

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(318): View more from Louisiana

I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now

Fav 15 5949 2027
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(201): View more from New Jersey

My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa

(708): View more from Illinois

Oh Jesus.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.

Fav 9 4152 1421
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(240): View more from Maryland

We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.

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(636): View more from Missouri

Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent

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(917): View more from New York City

I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.

Fav 9 4516 1400
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