Texts From Last Night · MrBeej's Favorites

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MrBeej's Favorites Texts:

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.

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(708): View more from Illinois

youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?

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(734): View more from Michigan

I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.

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(914): View more from New York

Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it

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(937): View more from Ohio

[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]

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(519): View more from Ontario

and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"

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