Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
