I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Randomize
