I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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