who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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