Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
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