I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
