Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
