I think my vagina is haunted
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
