yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
