Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I still have a little drunk in my system
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
