Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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