How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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